shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize