i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
