so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize