But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
My liver just had a heart attack.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
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