Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
