PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
