Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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