I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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