Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
