do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
