is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
