She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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