are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
