either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
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