She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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