jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Even the bartender felt bad for me
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
