You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize