Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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