I am puke
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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