do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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