My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
