I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
You're like the curious george of whores
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Randomize