I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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