margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I'm at about main and main street
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Randomize