saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
