Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
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