Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
