we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
kristin has been a bad kristin
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
my liver is dry heaving
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
