how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
A+ Viking dick
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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