I'm drive I can fine osifer
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
