And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
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