No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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