her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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