it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize