Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Randomize