i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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