So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Randomize
