Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize