Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Randomize
