office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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