Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
