dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I think i sorta joined a cult last night
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
