Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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