Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
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