Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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