Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
