Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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