just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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