If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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