guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Randomize
