Have you finally orgasmed yet?
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Randomize